Come To Me

 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

 —Matthew 11:28

God intends for us to live a well-rounded life in Christ Jesus, but there are times when that life is attacked from the outside. Then we tend to fall back into self-examination, a habit that we thought was gone. Self-awareness is the first thing that will upset the completeness of our life in God, and self-awareness continually produces a sense of struggling and turmoil in our lives. Self-awareness is not sin, and it can be produced by nervous emotions or by suddenly being dropped into a totally new set of circumstances. Yet it is never God’s will that we should be anything less than absolutely complete in Him. Anything that disturbs our rest in Him must be rectified at once, and it is not rectified by being ignored but only by coming to Jesus Christ. If we will come to Him, asking Him to produce Christ-awareness in us, He will always do it, until we fully learn to abide in Him.

Never allow anything that divides or destroys the oneness of your life with Christ to remain in your life without facing it. Beware of allowing the influence of your friends or your circumstances to divide your life. This only serves to sap your strength and slow your spiritual growth. Beware of anything that can split your oneness with Him, causing you to see yourself as separate from Him. Nothing is as important as staying right spiritually. And the only solution is a very simple one— “Come to Me….” The intellectual, moral, and spiritual depth of our reality as a person is tested and measured by these words. Yet in every detail of our lives where we are found not to be real, we would rather dispute the findings than come to Jesus.

-Oswald Chambers

It was 9:30ish pm. I walk in the door of my home and smell the warm, welcoming, aroma of pork chops and hear the smooth singers of soul. I shout I'm home so my roommate doesn't freak out and walk towards the kitchen. She greets me with a hug and a smile and offers me a pork chop. We sit down to bless the food. All the sudden I can't help but be overwhelmed at how good the Lord is in my life and I blurt out how blessed I am. I blurt.

We start this long conversation that lasts till midnight. First of all, my roommate loves the Lord like no other loves. She still struggles, gets overwhelmed, tired and lonely but she loves so fiercely and with abandonment. God is her best friend, she says. "Aint nobody gonna tell me He aint real, cause of all the times He's saved me and protected me." She inspires me to no end.

The next morning I wake with this sadness in my heart and pang in my chest like there's nothing worth living for. I get up, go to church, come home, but the sadness doesn't leave. I try to figure it out, try to figure it out, why am I sad, why am I sad. Nothing. 

I reach the porch of the library on my break and open a devotional that's talking about how being self aware sometimes is a bad thing. We become too focused on ourselves that we stop focusing on the Lord.

I get back from my break and open up Oswald to August 19th, today. The title is Self-Consciousness or Self-Awareness. I chuckled to myself and dove in. All day long Satan was telling me lies about what people were thinking about me, believing about me, judging me and I was believing every single one of those lies.

The Lord is good y'all! Pursue Him, seek Him and He will show you what you need to know, to help you in that moment. Praise His holy name!

Sincerely,

Gracie K.